Playing God
by monkeygirl77
Summary: What happens when Sam and Dean finally offend the Big G upstairs who wants to teach them a valuable lesson not to insult His parenting skills, well they become the babysitters to four fledgling archangels of course. These little angels are anything but little angels.


**So what if God got fed up with Sam and Dean thinking His job is just so freaking easy and decides to show them a day in the life?**

 **What better way then by turning His four Archangels back into fledglings and making the Winchesters babysit them for a day.**

* * *

 _~~"Next time you point a finger_

 _I might just have to bend it back_

 _And break it, break it off."~~_

 _==Paramore++Playing God_

* * *

 _Sam and Dean Winchester,_

 _Seeing as you seem to think my job is just so damn easy, which I don't take personally so don't worry, I want you to handle my kids for an entire day. From now to bedtime, you have to care for them and ensure that they are in one piece when I come for them tonight. It will be on your heads if anything should happen, and seeing as to who I am, it would be in both of your best interests that is how their day comes to an end._

 _Sincerely yours,_

 _Chuck_

That was the only forewarning they got before being given four young kids with high end supernatural abilities. Dean made a hand gesture as he turned to look at Sam with an apt impersonation of a fish out of water.

Sam gave his brother a look and turned his attention solely to the little boys in front of them.

The eldest of the children glared at him as he took a step forward, and the hunter was forced to an awkward stop. Sam ran a hand over his hair and shared a look with his brother.

"Umm, So, I'm Sam and this is my bro-"

"We know who you are."

He glowered at the older male, pulling all three of the youngers behind him a little more, the littlest one whined at the lack of entertainment and the blonde was quick in scooping him up. Giggles filled the air as fingers scribbled over the teeny guys belly, and it was enough to cut through the tension building between the oldest one and the Winchester brothers. Blue Eyes turned to smile at the little guy and the dark toned one grinned while trying to reach his own little hand up.

The teeny toddler squealed in childish joy when two of his brothers ganged up on him.

Sam cleared his throat, not sure how he felt about kids knowing them when they couldn't say the same. Dean was more then ready to do something half-cocked that would undoubtedly get them in more trouble than they needed.

Winchester son take two was taking charge in this one.

"Well, you know our names, isn't it only right that we know yours?"

The blonde turned to nod at Blue Eyes, sparing the poor abused belly for the moment, Youngest cooed and cuddled into his brother as the dark toned one grasped onto the back of his shirt and hid behind him.

Sighing, Blue Eyes turned back around, "I am Michael."

Dean dropped the gun he'd been...When did he pick up a gun?...Sam shook his head at his brother.

"And this is Lucifer."

Now that was a surprise, the young blonde boy who had looked as if he had been thoroughly enjoying himself torturing the little tykes tummy. Lucifer grinned up at him wickedly.

"That is Raphael."

The dark toned one peeked out from behind Lucifer's side, it was hard to believe that the Archangel who had taken out the entire East Coast was acting so shy.

"And the babe is Gabriel."

Okay, he has to ask, is that baby smirking at him? Gabriel is smirking at him, and waving his little fingers in the air happily.

"Daddy said that you two were our babysitters for the day."

Dean smirked, puffing up at per-usual, and nodded. Finally having the opportunity to one up the one person who has been a pain in his ass for the long past couple of years.

"That's right kiddo, and now you have to do what we say."

Michael grinned, reaching up, and yanking the hunter down by the front of his shirt. Note to self, just because they look like simple little kids does not mean they _are_ simple little kids.

"No, you have it wrong, you have to do what we say."

No way man!

Lucifer was looking down at his baby brother, rocking Gabriel back and forth soothingly, and then he sniffled, "Daddy, they were so mean to us! I'm trying to stop crying but they was scary! Made baby Gabe upset and scared Raphy and please don't let them get us!"

Dean's mouth dropped at the same moment Sam paled.

"You wouldn't! He would never buy it!"

"And you think He would pick you over us? His little _Angels_?"

* * *

 **8:00 am**

As it turns out, baby angels need sleep, they had learned that the hard way. Though it was passing knowledge that Michael and Lucifer knew this little piece of unknown information and just failed to share it with the class.

Gabriel had gotten cranky, and by cranky in Archangel standards that meant they needed to replace the entire Motel floor's light bulbs. The tyke started screaming, and as any child his age, Raphael took that as an opening to start screaming too. When the second youngest began his own screaming it then turned into a test to see who could scream louder.

Sam was practically plowing the heel of his palms into his ears trying to block out the shrill sound.

Dean groaned under his breath, bending forward at the waist, it was almost unbearable!

Michael and Lucifer exchanged looks, smirking at each other smugly, and as one they turned to pick up a baby angel.

Raphael cuddled into Michael's neck, humming happily at being coddled.

Gabriel cooed happily up at his big brother, cradled carefully in Lucifer's arms, yawning at the smooth little lullaby being hummed down at him.

"Go to sleep little brothers, far too early for you to be awake."

They retreated to the cheap motel couch, climbing up with their precious cargo rather easily, and settled down to watch cartoons. Dean groaned again, even though the shrill noise had ceased, and rubbed at his ears.

Sam rolled his eyes at his brother's dramatics and clicked the television, so long at the eldest two were entertained, they'd keep the younger two entertained.

* * *

 **12:00 pm**

Gabriel was not having a good day thus far. Mikey and Luci and Raphy had gotten their desired bagels for breakfast and now their nuggets for lunch, and yet he was supposed to eat that nasty rabbit food instead?

That was unfair!

Sam sighed in frustration as he pulled the fork of lettuce away again. His brother was laughing at him from behind, and he turned a bitch face in his general direction.

The other three were behaving like, well, like little angels, and then he got stuck with Gabriel.

"Sammy, try this."

He rolled his eyes as the chocolate snack pack was held out to him, and waved it away in annoyance.

"Dean, considering his size compared to ours, I think we should try and get him on better dietary habits, a salad won't kill him."

Gabriel was getting fed up here, he was trying to be nice and fun because Daddy had warned him of endless belly tickles if he didn't but he was starting to lose his cool. He wanted what he wanted and that was that.

Michael looked over at his baby brother, they could feel his irritation rolling from him in waves, and shook his head slowly. That was not a good idea.

Sam held the salad fork back out to the small child, and yelped as it was smacked out of his hand, Gabriel was glaring at him.

"No."

"Gab-"

"NO."

His three brothers looked over at the commotion, pausing in their movements at his tantrum, food held in various positions and stages of reaching their mouths. Dean crinkled his nose, smelling something off in the room, and just happened to look down.

The rubber stoppers on the bottom of Gabriel's high chair were melting into the floor.

He smacked Sam's shoulder, "Dude!", and pointed at the molten mess on the floor.

Raphael hopped down from his seat and trotted across the floor to meet them in their war zone. He knelt by the melting high chair legs, touched them with a finger to right it, and stood back up munching on the salad he'd picked up from the floor.

Sam made a face.

"Gabe only eats applesauce and chocolate pudding."

Their hunter babysitter shook his head sternly, turning a look on the baby messenger, "Well, that's cause your Dad can't parent. I'm an adult, he'll eat what he's given and right now he's getting veggies."

Gabriel narrowed his eyes as if to say something along the lines of 'oh really? try me kiddo' in some sort of challenge of authority. His hunter caretaker retrieved the fork he'd been using from the middle child and grabbed the bowl of salad.

The first mistake was setting the bowl anywhere near the littlest's hands.

Gabriel took one look at the leafy greens and swiped the entire bowl to the floor. Sam was more then ready to give the kid a piece of his mind, having reached his limit, when a small hand shot out in front of him holding a small container of Peanut Butter.

Their baby archangel squealed in happiness and took hold.

Another hand plopped celery sticks on the tray in front of him, Sam watched in mild shock as the little _pain in the ass_ dug out a scoop of PB with his celery stick and shoved the entire thing in his mouth.

"Daddy knows how to get Gabey to eat his veggies!"

Raphael smiled at him a bit too smugly.

"He also likes celery sticks and Peanut Butter. And broccoli and cheese."

Their backpack was hanging open, and Dean bent down to pick up the note dangling from it. The same fancy handwriting greeted them on the aged parchment.

 _Celery and PB for Gabe, love Daddy._

* * *

 **4:00 pm**

"Dean we are not taking them with us on a hunt! The answer is a big solid 'No'."

The younger Winchester shook his head, arms crossed over his broad chest, the idea of taking God's four sons on a hunt no matter the circumstance was a horrible idea even if his idiotic brother didn't seem to think so.

"Sam, this could be our only chance to catch the creepy crawly without having to waste our resources!"

Michael and Lucifer were watching them argue back and forth silently, observant as any older sibling should be.

"Come on Sammy, they're Archangels! They can do it just fine!"

Gabriel and Raphael were playing with the toys that had been packed in their day bag, zooming little toy cars everywhere they could. Dean smirked at his brother, kneeling in front of their youngest two.

"How would you like to help us?"

They exchanged looks and nodded enthusiastically, Daddy would be happy to hear that they had helped!

Michael looked over at Lucifer, and Lucifer over at Michael, they didn't think this was a good idea.

* * *

"RaRa I don't wanna help anymore!"

Raphael pulled his little baby brother closer, wide green eyes peering around the dark hall in fright, Gabriel whined quietly and his grip on his big brothers hand tightened considerably.

Sam and Dean had told them to walk down this hallway and if anything tried to grab them that they should scream as loud as they could, so loud that Daddy could hear them. Mikey and Luci had watched them wander inside carefully.

Though they were apart the bond that kept them together was still intact and so they could feel waves of comfort coming from their big brothers as they sensed their fear.

"RaRa I want Daddy!"

"Me too!"

* * *

Two twin screams filled the air around them and it was in that moment that Dean Winchester realized just what kind of mistake he had made. Michael and Lucifer rushed to the entrance of the old Treatment Ward just in time to see the doors slam shut.

Whatever it was they had come for now had two fledgling Archangels in their grasp.

Lucifer's fists clenched at his sides.

Michael spun around, his eyes a bright archangelic blue, raw energy crackled around his tightened fists.

"Do you have any idea what you've done!"

Pale blue wings flared out dangerously.

"If anything happens to my baby-"

"Michael, that's enough of that, now will someone tell me why My Earth just shook with the force of...Where are Gabriel and Raphael?"

How does one tell God that they used His two youngest Archangels as live bait?

...

"My my my, two baby archangels? A bit far away from the protection of Daddy aren't we?"

Gabriel shrieked in fright and jumped closer to his brother while Raphael tugged him closer and looked around for whatever it was that had spoken. Something was lurking around them, slithering in the shadows just out of sight.

There was silence that surrounded them.

And then Gabriel screamed, loud and terror filled, something had him by the ankle. Raphael screamed in fright as his baby brother was torn from his grasp, little Gabriel being dragged across the floor by whatever it was that had him by the ankle, clawing at the metallic tiles underneath him for some sort of friction to stop him from moving.

"Raphy! Raphy!"

Tears were glistening down his face as he called for his big brother for help.

"Gabe!"

* * *

"You did _what_!"

Sam rubbed a hand over the back of his head as he peered across over at his brother for some sort of help.

He recieved none.

"We sort of used them as bait."

"For _what_? I want my youngest sons and I want them now! They had better get back to me in one piece or it will be on your heads!"

"Let me at'em! I'll deal with it Daddy!"

Chuck swooped down, without so much as a single glance in the aforementioned direction, and snatched a hotheaded little blonde midflight for mischief.

"I don't think so Luci, you calm your little britches down, Daddy is not in the mood for your games."

Lucifer quieted down instantly, leaning against his Father's shoulder and picking at his curly hair.

"Sorry Daddy."

"It's alright, we'll talk about it later, you two,", He pointed a dangerous finger out at the two Winchesters, "Stay here. I am going to retrieve my youngest."

He kissed Lucifer softly on the temple and set him back down on the ground. Lucifer giggled happily at the attention he'd received and scurried back over to stand next to Michael like he was always told to when Daddy had to go off and do the work Himself.

"And when I do, _we_ are going to have a very long talk."

The Morningstar giggled again when Daddy scolded the two Hunters.

* * *

"Let him go."

The voice was strong, masculine, and underneath it was an unyeilding sort of _power._ It was like a rolling storm over the vast plains and the power of a wave building at sea.

It was the most threatening thing the beast had ever heard.

"And who might you be?"

Gabriel reached out for him in terror, fingers begging to be lifted away from the thing that was scaring him so much. Chuck looked around for the other one, never usually too far away from his brother, and there he was.

He waved the boy over.

"Raphael, come here."

His little healer scampered across the room, eyes filled with tears, and flung himself up to his Father. Chuck caught him rather easily and lifted the little guy from the floor.

The beast shrank under the intense glare shot its way.

"You don't _recognize_ who you see?"

Gabriel fell with a thud and a cry, pushed himself up rather quickly, and ran across the floor sobbing.

"Daaaaaaaddy!"

Chuck bent forward to swipe the fledgling up and cuddled him close in offer of comfort. The beast backed away, no longer feeling so cocky, and Chuck finally turned to look at it.

"I don't think it needs to be said that I can't allow you to get away with this."

"I...I.."

"Be _gone_."

And it was so.

Gabriel sobbed into His shoulder, clutching little tiny fingers into His shirt. Chuck cooed at him and kissed his little temple and fingers until he calmed down again.

"There there, you're alright, hush now little one you're alright."

Turning on His heel Chuck walked right back out the door. Michael and Lucifer upon sighting their brothers ran over as quick as they could. He ducked to allow them their look and when they were satisfied He stood back up. Michael took hold of His shirt, Lucifer on His foot, and He made His way back to the Winchesters.

Well now He couldn't very well go all wrathful on them, not when Gabriel was still sheezing from his sobs and Raphael was trembling in His arms. Sighing He merely turned a look on the pair of hunters.

"Listen boys, while this does _not_ make me happy, you did get them back to me in one piece."

He motioned for Michael to retrieve their bag.

"So thank you."

They were gone.

Dean breathed a sigh of releif and Sam gave a soft laugh, that could have ended so much worse.

And then their car wouldn't start.


End file.
